anxious


she sat on my couch and talked about faith.

quoted chapter and verse of what had to have been half the bible.

she told me she wasn’t worried that her medical bills were mounting…

that she had been wrongfully let go at work…

that the bank was threatening to foreclose on her home…

“God told me in advance there was gonna be a change.”

i shake my head in disbelief.

my anxiety comes from a kid who won’t sleep and those last five pounds i can’t shake.

“i only gotta keep my mind on Him.  self control, you know?  God only made us for 24 hour days, it’s when i get into the future i get anxious…”

i am stressed out all the time because i am twenty-five, and you don’t know much about your life when you’re twenty-five.  i want to see the five years, ten years, fifteen years from now so desperately.  but it’s cloudy at best.

“any time i get too far ahead, i hear God sayin ‘come on now, where you at?'”

 

indeed.  where am i?

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2 thoughts on “anxious

  1. Both you and the author of The Shack think God is a black woman. I must agree.

    And she’s so right about doing one day at time, which will feel easier with the upcoming short Wisconsin winter days.

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