Disturbance (Meditation Monday)
“Disturb us, Lord…”
I’ve read this before. The Prayer of Sir Francis Drake. It was plastered on scrapbook paper above my bed during my sophomore year of college.
The boldness, the daring shakes me like it’s the first time though.
“Disturb us, Lord, when We are too well pleased with ourselves,
When our dreams have come true
Because we have dreamed too little,
When we arrived safely
Because we sailed too close to the shore.”
Dreaming too little and sailing too closely are not typical accusations thrown in my direction. But have I settled for being labeled “reckless” by my peers when the very wild and unknown heart of God should be my pursuit?
“Disturb us, Lord, when
With the abundance of things we possess
We have lost our thirst
For the waters of life;
Having fallen in love with life,
We have ceased to dream of eternity
And in our efforts to build a new earth,
We have allowed our vision
Of the new Heaven to dim.”
I think about the new year. Things I want to do. Things I want to teach my daughter, teach others. Things that break my heart – for heartbreak has been a close companion lately.
I’m idealistic. My thoughts and opinions often dismissed by others on those grounds.
I just want the Kingdom to come. I refuse to settle for a smaller vision.
But life is hard, and looking for the Kingdom midst the brokenness and crap is exhausting.
And the trinkets of this world? They are soft and quite appealing. I am captivated by so little.
For what Kingdom do I dream of?
“Disturb us, Lord, to dare more boldly,
To venture on wider seas
Where storms will show your mastery;
Where losing sight of land,
We shall find the stars.
We ask You to push back
The horizons of our hopes;
And to push into the future
In strength, courage, hope, and love.”
Oh God that scares me. To go further? Really?
To dare even more boldly? Are You sure?
Disturb us…disturb us…disturb us.
Oh God, wake my heart. I am still numb to so much.
My heart, by breaking has awakened some,
but Lord, leave no corner untouched.
At one point I had a doorknob hanger that read, “already disturbed.” It is a reasonable response to the world.